I'm just your basic run of the mill humor blog. I don't spend a large amount of time on this blog anymore but I use my queue so that im not totally inactive

 

shouldnt:

THE FACT THAT THE AMERICAN PEDIATRIC SOCIETY TOLD AMERICAN SCHOOL SYSTEMS THAT TEENS SHOULD NOT BE UP BEFORE 8:30 AND ONLY 15% OF SCHOOLS LISTENED ANGERS ME SO MUCH

I was usually in my second class of the day by 8:30

officialputin:

putins-boyfriend:

putins-girlfriend:

yourtubes:

reblog if your url represents who you really are 

I am really Putin’s girlfriend

then we have a problem

I can explain it

Hey I found one that isn't lame

1. If you’ve ever tried drugs or alcohol, what was your reason for first trying it?

2. Do you think you could ever have an abortion if you unexpectedly turned up pregnant right this second?

3. If you were far from home and needed to sleep for the night, would you choose to rent a crappy motel room for $60 or sleep in your car for free?

4. Is there a color shirt you’d NEVER wear?

5. Is there a situation where you caved into peer pressure and regretted it?

6. What is your favorite video game console? Why?

7. Do you like vanilla candles?

8. Have you ever been in a relationship that was going great, and then suddenly something weird happened and you just KNEW it was going to be over soon?

9. Would you ever bleach your hair platinum blonde?

10. What are your plans for tomorrow?

11. What did you have for breakfast?

12. Have you had sex in 2014 yet?

13. Who last slept in your bed besides you?

14. What time did you wake up today?

15. How long until your next birthday?

16. What was the last movie you watched?

17. If you could see any musician live, front row, who would you choose?

18. When did you last consume something that had peanut butter?

19. What’s the last song you heard?

20. When you say you love someone, do you mean it?

21. Do you plan on sleeping in tomorrow?

22. Do you still talk to any of your ex’s?

23. As of this minute, what is going through your mind?

24. Where’s the last place you went?

25. Have you held hands with anyone lately?

26. Has anyone let you down recently?

27. Does it bother you when people try to make you jealous?

28. Whats the next movie you want to see in theaters?

29. Do you have more than $50 in your room?

30. Are both of your blood parents still in your life?

31. Were you tired when you woke up this morning?

32. Who is probably talking a load of crap about you right now?

33. When was the last time you went apple picking?

34. Do you sometimes wake up in the morning, lay in bed and think about life?

35. Are you happy summer is coming soon?

36. Do you have drama in your life?

I brought my portable super Nintendo to work and now everyone is all up in my junk

gif set from movie

Person1: "I really love this part of the movie"

Person2: "did you know...*random related fact*..."

Person3: "oh wow that is interesting"

Person4: "cool"

Person5: "LET ME TELL YOU A THING" *spews of tons of facts that are somewhat related but is really just person5 saying 'look at my smartyness'*

rants-ofachronicallyillsoul:

huffingtonpost:

Matt Damon Does Ice Bucket Challenge With Toilet Water For 800 Million Without Clean H2O

Matt Damon was conflicted when friends Jimmy Kimmel and Ben Affleck called on him to complete the ALS ice bucket challenge.

Find out who Damon challenges here. 

i appreciate how he highlights my biggest problem with the ALS ice bucket challenge. i understand why the creator of the challenge choose to do this, but sooo many people are doing this uncritically. it especially angers me when fellow Californians dump water on their heads, and then don’t even mention ALS.

look at how his muscles flex after he dumps the water on his head. amazing

svveden:

games for windows can suck an ass

just one ass? why not several?

Why i chose to go to college

"you can’t get putang in a cardboard box"

im watching kill bill and i dont think they understand how blood works

fat jokes will forever be the highest form of humor and im being 100% serious

terrakion:

fuck i meant fart jokes im really sorry this is completely my fault i didnt even realize. fat jokes are obviously never okay and being fat myself i would never think that fat jokes are okay shit im sorry

You know what, you’re right. Fart jokes don’t hurt anyone and they are hilarious

wreck-it-mikey:

being too shy to ask for wi-fi passwords

image

That’s actually the reason why I became a hacker

(Source: heatcrashemboar)

housewifeswag:

this speaks to me on a spiritual level.

I want that so much I almost threw up

(Source: usenowayasway)

collegehumor:

The comments section is a dangerous place.

Finish reading —> Beyond Trolls: The 6 Other Creatures Lurking In Every Comment Section

I’m kinda worried that this will become common knowledge on the internet and because people suck at spelling, a lot of people will be called sphincters